(My column for October 2015…)
PLAUSIBLE NEWS SERVICE
“Keeping Ahead of Reality Since 2001”
BLOCKBUSTER SEQUEL “WWIII” SET TO BEGIN FULL-SCALE PRODUCTION
NEW YORK (Plausible News Service) – Based on well-placed industry sources, Plausible News Service has learned that a major announcement will be forthcoming shortly from the world’s leading powers, concerning their collaboration on the long-anticipated blockbuster “World War III.”
The sequel, which promises to “wrap up many unresolved plot elements from the previous installments of the series, while further developing others and also breaking entirely new ground,” is expected to launch sometime in the next few months. The exact date is shrouded in secrecy, though recent activity over Syria suggests that rehearsals may already be underway.
Development of the new production has been delayed for years, though in the meantime audiences have been treated to a succession of smaller, related efforts, including “Korea,” “Vietnam,” “Iraq: Parts I and II” and the longest-running spinoff, “Afghanistan,” which many industry observers expect will be renewed for several more seasons, despite recent rumors of its supposed imminent cancellation. Its myriad characters and sometimes baffling plot lines are reportedly being worked into the larger opus. Many of the leading actors from past installments will be returning, some in new roles, along with the addition of exciting new players. Producers have also hinted that they “have a few surprises up their sleeves,” and that “you just never know who might show up in the middle of all the action.” Unusual alliances, unanticipated plot twists, and shocking betrayals are expected. “We’re moving away from the simple, good-versus-evil narratives of the past,” said a member of the creative team. “Things will be more ambiguous. People may not know who to root for, or they may discover that there are actually no good guys at all.”
Delicate high-level negotiations have been ongoing among the participants and their financial backers for some time to arrange the exact terms and scope of the coming conflict, which all parties agree could be tremendously beneficial for ruling interests around the globe. Locations to be used are reportedly spread across all continents, with most of the initial action taking place in the Middle East and Mediterranean regions. It is expected that at least some of the countries involved will enjoy a long-term boost to their troubled economies as a result, as thousands of personnel and billions of dollars in support equipment and machinery will be poured into the areas where shooting will take place.
“The problem with staging catastrophic global conflagrations like this, of course, is the possibility that things might get out of hand,” said a source familiar with the effort, who asked not to be identified. “There are certain special effects that just about everyone agrees we want to avoid using, but given the highly improvisational nature of these productions, slip-ups can certainly happen, no matter how carefully we try to keep everyone on script.”
The production will be fraught with risks and dangers for all concerned, of course; while predictions for its profitability are very optimistic, the possibility that the whole thing could bomb is also high. But one thing is for certain, according to our sources: “You won’t be able to take your eyes away.”